Before Bryce and I started fostering, we looked into private adoption. We began the works to create our profile and began our research. Ultimately we decided against it, because it just was not right for us. Us being the key word. Growing a family, is a sacred calling. As a couple, you decide how to best add additions to your family. That being said, the following are our personal opinions about why you should choose to foster to adopt.
- With private adoption you normally have to pay a huge sum of money up front. Expenses can include but are not limited to mother’s medical expenses, hiring an attorney, home studies, adoption agency fees, and the list goes on. When you foster to adopt, the state covers all of those expenses. In addition your licensing agency and adoption specialist help walk you through every step of the way and are excellent resources when you have questions or concerns.
- Children who are adopted through the foster care system receive a monthly stipend until the age of 18. They also receive dental and medical insurance, including if needed behavioral services. Which is important to best provide the best care for your child. In our family, this has been a blessing. Our youngest foster/adoptive daughter was born with meth in her system, we have been able to give her the medical help needed with the continual check ups to ensure she is developing appropriately. Our older foster/adoptive daughter and son have needed a lot of dental work due to the enormous amount of cavities they each had when they moved into our home.
- When you adopt through foster care, you know you are giving a home and a family to a child who truly needs it. You are literally giving a child a second chance at life. Whether you are adopting an infant or older child. We are not going to lie it is difficult, because it does take time to form a relationship of mutual love and respect. Key word time. Be patient with your kiddos and yourself. These kids come from different backgrounds and experiences. It is not about having them forget their backgrounds and experiences, but about incorporating them with your own. Trust us, its worth it!
In both private adoption and foster to adopt circumstances, there can be heartache. In fact, expect it up front. I think that makes it easier. In private adoption, parents can change their minds last minute. It is very important to remember that the ultimate goal with foster care is reunification to parents. There are circumstances where that just does not happen, but children deserve to be placed in a home where they are loved and cared for as your own regardless. If you believe you cannot truly do that you can adopt children from foster care system whose parental rights have already been severed.
Hope this helps. If you have any questions, please feel free to reach out to us. If we do not know the answer, we can direct you in the right path!